Life Stages in 3 Rings

I was a senior at UNC when Earle proposed. He teasingly got down on one knee and presented me with a lovely box containng a stunning solitare. It had been his mother's and she had given it to him to give to me. If made me feel welcome and a part of the family. I wore it with pride and great hope for the future.

A few years and two sons later and I am frequently wrist deep in mud, playdough, sand, and worse. I find myself at a jeweler's who offers to clean it for me. Upon returning it, he remarks, "It was a really valuable diamond. Too bad you chipped it." I peered closely and sure enough there was a visible chip on one side. My gut clenched. When I admitted my transgression to my mother-in-law it clenched even tighter. She was disappointed, and I, even more so. I ultimately slipped the ring off in fear of doing more damage. 

 And then came our fifteen wedding addiversary. I had been wearing a plain white gold band for years, a little jealous of friends who showed off their new anniversary bands, or other such sentimental pieces given from husband to wife. To rectify the situation, Earle took me to Jewelsmith and together with a jeweler we designed a sturdy ring with a lovely diamond, encased in a bezel to protect the stone. I loved the final product and wore it with pride for many years. A single glance at it made me feel special. It was a one-of-a-kind ring born of our union.I was finally coming into my own and this ring echoed my new sense of self.

But life happens. And late in 2019 the band broke. I was so busy with the whirlwind of Christmas and caregiving for my mom that I slipped it off and went back to my original plain band. After so many years my finger felt bare again.

 On Christmas in 2019 my son and his wife gave me a delightful ring stamped with tiny mushrooms. I loved it! It joined other silver rings in a small bowl from which I selected a ring to wear daily. But soon, I wasn't dressing to go out of the house. Including no visit to get my ring repaired. Finally, in the summer, in an attempt to reclaim a bit of normal, I made an effort to wear an occasional piece of jewelry. I was drawn to the mushroom ring. It was a bit snug on my right hand, but fit beautifully on my left. And so I began to wear it, paired with my wedding band.

My first ring told the world I was to be married. My second ring told me I was valuable and unique. But this ring, in the time of a global pandemic tells me even more. Nat had Lilly had had it inscribed inside with the words EVEN IN THE DARK, GOOD THINGS GROW. This ring tells me joy, peace, and happiness can be found even when life seems devoid of light. It urges me to name those good things, cherish those good things, express gratitude for those good things and hope for more good things. This ring tells me to look for the good, to expect the good. And to grow, despite the conditions.

I have had others admit to me, in an almost an embarrassed way, that they have prospered during this time. They have stayed home, they have cooked in, they have spent more times with the ones they love, treasured the quiet, and walked closer with God. They have read more, created more, written letters, taken photos and done many things they have never had the time to do. And while we all ache for those lost, including my own precious first cousin, Marcia, we have learned to take this pandemic, one day, one hour, one minute at a time while we wait for a vaccine, for the return of spring, for a healed nation, and for that far off day when we can hug one another again.

 But for now, we stay still and quiet, full of peace and hope, and like a mushroom flourishing in the dark, we wait.